Tag: sobriety

Do you have a recovery community on your side? If not, you may be missing out on one of the very best elements that sober living has to offer. The recovery “community” is vast and can be broken down into an endless number of groups and organizations. From Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) to private support groups and residential treatment centers, recovering addicts all across America are helping each other to face their fears and heal from the past.

But jumping head-first into one facet of the community isn’t always wise; it’s important to take your time and find the community that suits you best. Not every group or meeting will be right for every person, as the recovery from addiction is not a one-size-fits-all process or journey, and that’s okay!

Once you find your group, the benefits of association are extensive. Forging new relationships with people who understand your story is a priceless gift that you simply can’t buy with money alone. But that’s not where the healing ends; there’s much more to the story. Let’s take a look at how the right community can help you heal.

Sharing Your Vision

Your ideal recovery community should share your vision of what recovery looks like. For some, that could mean total abstinence, while for others, it may include harm reduction strategies like methadone replacement therapy or SMART Recovery strategies instead. There’s no one approach that’s right for every person, so it’s okay to spend some time talking with your care team about what might work best for you.

When you belong to a community that shares your overall vision for recovery, you instantly become connected to people who strive to achieve the same lifestyle and recovery goals as you. That not only makes you feel more supported but can also have a positive effect on everything from accountability to attendance at meetings.

On the other hand, choosing the wrong recovery community can be a bit of a disaster if the others within it don’t share your vision. For example, someone who is particularly prone to relapses may find SMART Recovery communities triggering simply because the approach makes allowances for harm reduction instead of abject abstinence. In contrast, someone who finds the AA program too restrictive to their current situation may stop attending simply because of the pressure.

Healing often requires going back to the nitty gritty basics, so starting from wherever you are is best. Choose your recovery community based on where you are right now, and always recognize that your needs may change down the road.

Remember: Good recovery communities stay true to the recovery path at all times, no matter what the activity or meeting topic. Safety comes first!

Staying True to the Cause

The best recovery groups are focused on the cause at all times – recovery. While the community may meet for socialization, volunteer together, or even just spend time hanging out together outside of meetings, the overall focus needs to remain the same throughout.

Communities that schedule events at drinking establishments or host parties where substances are readily available should raise red flags, regardless of whether you happen to be an alcoholic or not.

Likewise, communities that continually allow members to attend meetings intoxicated, or allow otherwise disruptive behaviors freely, are often more focused on the drama that happens within them than the cause in the first place.

Good communities have strong, experienced leaders (be it a therapist or just your peers) with the ability to set guidelines, rules, or goals as needed to keep the group in check. When problems arise, they’ll handle issues privately or within the group only after getting permission. They’ll check in with the group and verify everyone’s recovery goals, too, and show a willingness to adjust when adjustments are necessary.

It’s also important to recognize that the “right community” should contain leaders sourced from within the community itself. People who have directly experienced addiction or recovery personally have much to share, and learning from their triumphs and mistakes can help you achieve or avoid your own goals and problems, too.

Remember: a recovery community takes its strength from its members, and leaders who come from the group are a sign of its longevity and strength.

Supporting Accountability

We’ve talked about the importance of accountability in recovery before; being honest and truthful about where you are is really the only way to move forward, even if reality isn’t particularly appealing to look at right now.  You have to start from where you are, no matter how low your rock-bottom is. After all, if you don’t judge how deep the hole is, you can’t possibly know whether to jump out, use the ladder, or ask your support network to extend you a rope.

Unfortunately, within the realm of recovery communities, this can lead to uniquely challenging and difficult situations.

Here’s an example: When your meeting group smells alcohol on your breath but you claim you haven’t been drinking (even though you know very well you have), and they don’t call you on it, they aren’t requiring you to be accountable for your actions. That’s a problem simply because it allows you to continue with your destructive behaviors unchecked.

But demanding accountability, especially in early recovery or relapse, can sometimes be perceived as a slight. You’re sensitive, already aware of your failings, and they want you to admit it, too? Ouch.

Despite the fact that it can seem like your recovery group or community is pushing you too hard to be honest, both with them and yourself, their request for accountability really is in your best interest. They’re not trying to hurt you; they’re trying to keep you on track and to give you the insight needed to get back on the track altogether when you’ve lost your way.

Your community depends on you just as much as you depend on them, and they deserve honesty about how you’re doing. Good group leaders know that just the requirement of accountability itself can help prevent future relapses and slips.

There’s one small thing to keep in mind with regard to groups that demand accountability; don’t confuse it with aggression. The very best communities will temper the request with patience, understanding, and support, not with verbal aggression, anger, or complete and permanent ousting.

Remember: If you are attacked, insulted, ostracized, or disrespected, walk away. It’s not okay for anyone to abuse you, be it verbal or physical in nature.

Encouraging Holistic Healing

The recovery community might be focused on recovery as its first and primary vision, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that recovery should be the only focus or topic tabled for discussion.

Good recovery communities go the distance and are frequently less of just a group and more of an overall virtual village. They encourage healing from a holistic perspective and support you in achieving a healthier overall lifestyle, teaching you how to have fun and live life free of substances and dangerous behaviors. As recovery is a lifelong process, this is important.

Look for communities that encourage a broad range of activities and support methods first. Lots of options mean plenty of opportunities to get involved, keeping you engaged, interested, and committed without growing bored.

Regular holistic health activities could include weekly walks, events at safe and sober locations, movie nights, hobby groups, yoga classes, or even something as simple as social hours where recovering addicts can interact and have fun in a safe space. Or it could be as complex as a leader who creates referrals for you to ensure that you’re seen by a doctor, therapist, or medical care team instead.

As you interact, you’ll recover from addiction and potentially heal other areas of your life at the same time, growing happier and more at peace.

Remember: Find a recovery community that supports you holistically to increase your chances of success. Whether it’s a sober living facility or meeting group, addressing your overall health is important!

Connecting with the right recovery community or group isn’t always easy, but the research shows that it’s research shows that it’s more than worth it. That’s why many patients decide to start with inpatient treatment or sober living facilities first. Having that safe, guided experience during the first few days and weeks of detox and recovery can be invaluable, especially if you’ve struggled or failed with other outside resources in the past. Finding the right recovery community, be it inpatient or out, isn’t just a temporary fix; it’s a stepping stone to getting the right support, healing your traumas, and forging lifelong friendships, too.